Happy Martians May Soon Walk Along Manhattan's Great Midway

Martians are trying to signal Broadway.

So declares Lord Kelvin.

In a speech at Delmonico's Lord Kelvin announced that the myriad electric lights of Broadway made a spot of light so brilliant upon the face of the earth that the Martians could not help but notice it, and that in consequence their frequent signals noticed by astronomers are really but an attempt to get into communication with the Bright Light district.

This, of course, is a blow to Nikola Tesla, who has confided to the rest of the world that it was he who had been signaling Mars for years past, and reading the answer in the stars. The theory of the great British scientist that the people of Mars have neglected the signals of Tesla is uncomplimentary, but Tesla will probably not be much disturbed thereby.

According to Lord Kelvin, the Martians for years past have been reading the electric lighted devices of Tom O'Rourke and "Lid" McCoy, and have been frantically trying to signal back to earth answers to these signs.

If the Martians be as highly developed in intelligence as we have been taught to believe, it is quite probable that they have been endeavoring to arrange for visits to New York, to walk the brightly lighted thoroughfare that leads from Madison Square to Long Acre Square, to eat of the lobster dispensed beneath the sign of the green and red dragon and to wander through the portals of the New York Theatre, whose incandescent shield has become familiar to all Martians owning even low power telescopes.

This is a pleasing reflection to New Yorkers and should greatly increase their pride and gratification. The thought that the people of Mars are feverishly trying to attract the attention of New York in order to taste of the pleasures it affords must cause a thrill of pride to every man who owns Broadway as a walking place.